If you have ever traveled with children you know just how excited they can be for all of the adventure ahead. I remember as a child believing that a family vacation was as simple as jumping in the truck and jumping out when we arrived. I would be in the back bed of a truck. Yes, you read that correctly. My parents would place a mattress in the back bed of a truck. I would hop in with my pillow a deck of cards, paper and crayons and a blanket. My siblings and I would play card games, have pillow fights and maybe take a nap. If we had to use the rest room we would knock on the back window and write a note "PEE" to show my parents. When we arrived at the camping location we would all jump out a run to the lake as fast as our little tiny legs could get there. After checking out the lake and the playground we would head back to camp and the tents were magically up, the bags showed up automatically in our space and we were ready for vacation!
My current memories as an adult heading out on a vacation are very different. The first thing I learned after going on a family vacation in my adult life is that it really isn't a vacation. It is an enormous amount of work! P.P.P. Planning, Prepping and Packing! When I think of the Planning, Prepping and Packing my mind hears Lions and Tigers and Bears Oh My! :-) At least when my mind goes to that I can giggle and continue with the work for the vacation ahead. Wait, vacation? Is it really a vacation?
As I work on my P.P.P I hear my children "Are we leaving?" I respond "Not Yet!" and continue to make food, pack coolers, look for their favorite sleeping blanket and continue to cross items off my list. While this is taking place they are running around as if they had a few 5 Hour Energy drinks with their breakfast. As quick as I can pack a blanket or pillow they have pulled it because "I just wanted to snuggle it quick" only to have me re-pack it and maybe add it back to my list just in case. If you are a parent that has a child with a favorite blanket you know what bedtime would look like if we forgot it at home.
Hours later the truck is packed. I am double checking the boat for life jackets, ensuring the coolers have enough ice. Checking that the boys have shoes on, yes actually looking at their feet to see them. When they were asked during my P.P.P. if they had their shoes on they would respond "not yet" and continue to wrestle, run in and out of the house anticipating the great vacation without a care in the world. I ask myself again, is this a vacation?
Finally we are on our way. Everyone is buckled (not in the bed of the truck) and we pull out of the driveway. We travel just under five miles and it starts. You know exactly what takes place. Things like, can I have a snack? Not yet. Can we change the station? Not yet. How long till we get there. We just left. Are we going to stop at a gas station? Not Yet. This is the start to our vacation and we aren't even there, Yet!
I think about the perspectives that children have about a family vacation. Consider my view as a child. Things magically appeared in the truck and magically unpacked themselves upon arrival. My family all appeared at the same location at the same time. I had cousins to run around with for immediate play time upon exiting the vehicle. When I was hungry there was food and snacks. When it was bed time I had my comfy PJs and my sleeping bag was all rolled out for me. It was magical. It was a vacation. I have fond memories summer after summer of this taking place.
As an adult I have a very different perspective. I do not believe these camping adventures are a vacation. I believe they are a trip. One can say these two words mean the same thing. I beg to differ. A trip is full of work. P.P.P for every single situation that might take place. Thinking of all of the members of our family and ensuring you didn't forget anything. Considering what we might need on the drive, who will have to stop to use the restroom and when. What we have to entertain the children if there it is raining. Do I have all of the meds in case they get bit by a bee? What about the thermometer if they develop a fever? Did I grab my sons asthma medication in case it is humid and he has trouble breathing? This is all mentally exhausting and this is a trip. A trip is with children.
Then you might ask what is a vacation? A vacation is without children. A time when you only have to pack your own clothing and don't have a care in the world as to what may or may not take place. If it rains, who cares. If you forget something, no worries. If you don't want to pack food, go out to eat. If you are stranded on the side of the road with a flat, not a big deal you don't have children to entertain. What happens if you forgot your favorite blanket? Oh well, have another adult beverage and forget about it. This is vacation. I don't have to be asked if we are there yet. I don't need to hear if it is my turn yet. I am not worried about who is out in the water swimming. I can just relax. I can eat, sleep, and entertain myself whenever I want to. This is a vacation.
I do enjoy both a trip and a vacation. I consider the pure joy in children anticipating "Are we there yet?" I remember as a child the feeling as we arrived closer to the lake. The smiles, giggles, raised heart rate and then upon arrival jumping up and down or running to our cousins to see if they wanted to check out the lake. I see this joy in my children and it makes our trips worth all of the stress that might occur during the P.P.P I also enjoy a vacation. I have no guilt in taking a vacation to rejuvenate myself. Both are needed in life and both create different memories.
I also need to remind myself that I can embrace the joy and anticipation of the question "Are we there yet?" I can also celebrate when we arrive. I still have a few years experiencing this with my children. They are not gown-ups, YET! I can still make memories with them. I can change my attitude about our trips. I can embrace the chaos. Before I know it they will be adults and experiencing their own vacations and soon enough trips with their own children.
They are not there YET!
They are still little.
They are still mine.
I can embrace the chaos. They are not gone, YET!
Don't blink.
Take the trips.
Answer them just one more time when they ask, "Are we there yet?"
There is power in the word YET and our perspective can change the meaning of this simple three letter word.
